A guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy each other’s company. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither [...]

Please share this story with your friends and family who have children who go on-line. Shannon could hear the footsteps behind her as she walked toward home. The thought of being followed made her heart beat faster. “You’re being silly,” she told herself, “no one is following you.” To be safe, she began to walk [...]

1. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. 2. Memorize your favorite poem. 3. Don’t believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want. 4. When you say, “I love you”, mean it. 5. When you say, “I’m sorry”, look the person in the eye. 6. Be engaged [...]

Between the ages of 15 – 20, a woman is like Africa. She is half discovered, half wild. Between the ages of 20 – 30, a woman is like America. Fully discovered and scientifically perfect. Between the ages of 30 – 35, she is like India & Japan. Very hot, wise and beautiful. Between the [...]

B y the time the Lord made mothers, he was into the sixth day working overtime. An Angel appeared and said “Why are you spending so much time on this one?” The Lord answered and said, “Have you read the spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic; have 200 [...]

If we could all make this kind of a difference…. There is a story many years ago of an elementary teacher. Her name was Mrs. Thompson. And as she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children a lie. Like most teachers, she looked [...]

An accountant is someone who knows the cost of everything and the value of nothing. An auditor is someone who arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded. A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain. (Mark [...]

CALIFORNIA DUMB LAWS * Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship. * It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale. * No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour. [...]

RABBIT 1915 1927 1939 1951 1963 1975 1987 1999 YOUR FORTUNE will go up and down this year – especially if you were born in 1939. You may feel restricted, with few opportunities to put your ideas into action. For rabbits born in 1963 and 1975, consider your options carefully before you make any moves. [...]

Jan 21 to Feb19 You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. You make the same mistakes repeatedly because you are stupid. Everyone thinks you are a fucking Jerk. You enjoy sucking cock. Feb 20 to Mar 19 You have vivid imagination and often think you are [...]